Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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