i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.