well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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