I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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