Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I just forgot I was standing up.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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