that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize