Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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