Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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