omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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