The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
