C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
another moral hangover. fuck.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.