I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Randomize
