We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
