I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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