omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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