hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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