His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
