Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
