If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
