The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
