How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize
