can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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