I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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