I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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