In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
