I must be too annoying 4 u.
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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