Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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