So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
