yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
