What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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