apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
