Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
