so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
