If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
