so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
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Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
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I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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