she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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