Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.

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(503): View more from Oregon

I could make wine with my vomit

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(810): View more from Michigan

kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(407): View more from Florida

Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?

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(847): View more from Illinois

I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.

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(209): View more from California

Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"

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