just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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