i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
