i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling