i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
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