Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
