i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
one two three fourrrrnication!
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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