'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
