I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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