it hurts more in the daytime
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
