a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
