Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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