I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
