I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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