And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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